While sitting in front of the fireplace and musing about James Bond (Weird!):
Pete: Well, of course you know who the best James Bond is, right?
Me: Of course! It’s Sean Connery.
Me: The first and the best.
Pete: Sean Connery wasn’t the first James Bond
Me: (jerking around to look at him, startled) Say what?! Of course he was!
Pete: No, he wasn’t. There was one guy before him. He was only in one movie. The one where James Bond got married.
Me: No, you’re thinking of On Her Majesty’s Secret Service. That was, like, the sixth movie or something. I can’t remember that James Bond’s name, but that’s the guy who only did one. (It’s George Lazenby, I found out.)
Pete: No, that wasn’t the one. It was the one where he got married…the first one…and then at the end..
Me: Yeah…then at the end his wife got shot. I remember. It’s On her Majesty’s Secret Service. And that wasn’t the first James Bond. The first James Bond was Dr. No. Starring Sean Connery.
Pete: You’re wrong.
Me: Oh HELL NO! I am not wrong…I am 100% sure of this.
Pete: Come on…I was born in the 70s and I’m a boy…I know these things.
Me: Woah…you may be a boy and have disco fever, but I was once a strange 11 year old who read every single James Bond book and watched every single James Bond movie and had my life planned out exactly about how I was going to become a spy when I grew up (back me up here, Mom!). Seriously…I’m right.
Pete: Wanna bet?
Me: YES! Of course…because I’m right.
Pete: OK, what’s the bet.
Me: If I’m right, I’ll clean the kitchen every day for a week…even when I cook. If I’m wrong, for a whole week, you have to pick up my shoes wherever I leave them (he HATES this) AAAAND you have to make the bed every day.
Pete: I already make the bed everyday!
Me: Yes, but you have to do it without bitching that I’m not helping you.
Pete: OK, deal!
Me: You’re going to learn a very valuable lesson about doubting my capacity for trivial knowledge…
Yesterday, on gmail chat:
Me: Have fun picking up my shoes, Jackass!