A conversation Tuesday night

While sitting in front of the fireplace and musing about James Bond (Weird!):

Pete: Well, of course you know who the best James Bond is, right?

Me:  Of course!  It’s Sean Connery.

Pete:  Right!

Me:  The first and the best.

Pete:  Sean Connery wasn’t the first James Bond

Me: (jerking around to look at him, startled)  Say what?!  Of course he was!

Pete:  No, he wasn’t.  There was one guy before him.  He was only in one movie.  The one where James Bond got married.

Me:  No, you’re thinking of On Her Majesty’s Secret Service.  That was, like, the sixth movie or something.  I can’t remember that James Bond’s name, but that’s the guy who only did one.  (It’s George Lazenby, I found out.)

Pete:  No, that wasn’t the one.  It was the one where he got married…the first one…and then at the end..

Me:  Yeah…then at the end his wife got shot.  I remember.  It’s On her Majesty’s Secret Service.  And that wasn’t the first James Bond.  The first James Bond was Dr.  No.  Starring Sean Connery.  

Pete:  You’re wrong.

Me:  Oh HELL NO!  I am not wrong…I am 100% sure of this.

Pete:  Come on…I was born in the 70s and I’m a boy…I know these things.

Me:  Woah…you may be a boy and have disco fever, but I was once a strange 11 year old who read every single James Bond book and watched every single James Bond movie and had my life planned out exactly about how I was going to become a spy when I grew up (back me up here, Mom!).  Seriously…I’m right.

Pete:  Wanna bet?

Me:  YES!  Of course…because I’m right

Pete:  OK, what’s the bet.

Me:  If I’m right, I’ll clean the kitchen every day for a week…even when I cook.   If I’m wrong, for a whole week, you have to pick up my shoes wherever I leave them (he HATES this) AAAAND you have to make the bed every day. 

Pete:  I already make the bed everyday!

Me:  Yes, but you have to do it without bitching that I’m not helping you.

Pete: …

Pete:  OK, deal!

Me:  You’re going to learn a very valuable lesson about doubting my capacity for trivial knowledge…


Yesterday, on gmail chat:

Me:  Have fun picking up my shoes, Jackass!


Him:  Damn.



3 responses to this post.

  1. Posted by Ezra on November 21, 2008 at 2:51 pm

    Niven (original casino royale)
    Connery (back for Diamonds are forever)
    Connery (back for “unofficial” Thunderball remake Never Say Never Again)

    If you have a Y chromosome you should have this memorized. The only possible exception is remembering that David Niven was in the Casino Royale spoof. No one really cares about that one.


  2. Posted by Glenn Lithgow on November 22, 2008 at 9:01 pm

    Hey Taylor,

    In the interest of supporting the Y chromosome side of the debate, I have to point out that technically Barry Nelson played the first “screen” James Bond in a 1954 episode of Climax!, which was based upon Flemming’s Bond novel Casino Royale. But I suppose Pete doesn’t have to find out until he is done picking up all your shoes for a while….tee-hee-hee


  3. Posted by Bryan Kennedy on November 24, 2008 at 2:18 pm

    What about the TV show? Or the Radio serial in South Africa? Besides, Daniel Craig is MUCH better 😛


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