What Sarah Palin named me

Haven’t you been wondering what ridiculous name Sarah Palin would have given you if she was your mom?

Well, now you can find out! Hot Damn!

I’m sorry to say mom and dad, that my name of Taylor just simply isn’t small-town enough. You named me something pretentious and liberal that followed your San Francisco Values and not the small-town values of America. I guess you coulnd’t help it, since you chose to raise me in the bustling metropolis of Waverly, that has the staggering population of 180 people. Mom, Dad: why do you hate America?

So, on that vein, I’ve decided to throw off the yoke of your communo-facist name and adopt my God-Given Sarah Palin approved name. A name of AMERICA.

Ladies and Gentlemen, you can henforce call me:

GEESE WHALEBONE PALIN

So much better than Taylor Autumn. And I think Geeseopolis has a nice ring (honk?) to it, don’t you?

Seriously, this is funny. Go get ya a name!

And you MUST read the comments…that’s the best part.

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3 responses to this post.

  1. Posted by Ezra on September 18, 2008 at 10:17 pm

    Rust Mustang Palin. I will answer to Rusty or ‘Stang. (not to be confused with sting)

    Reply

  2. Posted by Teresa on September 19, 2008 at 10:47 pm

    Quarter Granite Palin
    (Seriously, I have the strong feeling that my name would cause most people like Palin to die from its un-American-ness. HA!)

    Reply

  3. I like my name.
    Mole Valdez Palin.
    I have great plans to finally bring coffee to the subteranean realms.

    Ezra, I’m sorry but I will now be unable to think of you without linking you to that most illicit of acts “The Rusty Mustang”*.

    [*Ok, so I don’t actually know what that is.]

    Reply

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