Do you want to see how crazy I am? Read on…

Our original plan for Thanksgiving was to head south to meet up with my parents and spend the holiday with my Great Aunt and Uncle. However, since my clumsiness and devil-may-care attitude in regards to OH MY HOLY HELL sharp knives, I have inadvertently put my parents and myself in the poor house. When I meekly asked my mother “are we still going for Thanksgiving” and her response was an audible scoff and some less-than-savory mumbling, I realized that the trip was off.

We came up with a new plan to host a small Thanksgiving for Pete’s immediate family (because his non-immediate family could fill Fenway Park) at our house. There are two problems with this scenario:

1. I was really trucking along with getting things painted an organized and settled when I sliced open my thumb. Since then, I have been generally out of commission. My doctor said I wasn’t even allowed to pick up a box (ha! which I’ve totally ignored) or do anything which even hinted at the possibility of busting my tendon sutures. Now generally I would say “OK yeah Doc…got it” and then immediately go home and proceed to put up drywall or harvest a cotton field by myself, but this time I have actually been very, very careful. Partially because I live in fear of ever having surgery again and partially because I know that if I mess my hand up, my mother will cut me out of the will come up here and pull my face off (I don’t know which is worse, actually). Now granted, that does mean that I have carried many boxes of books around (putting very, very little stress on my hand! I swear!) and I did move the entire bedroom around by myself (but I pushed with my shoulder!), so I have gotten a little but done, but the fixing-up ground to and all-but stop.

But HOLY SHIT! Now there are people coming over in a week! Not that his parents haven’t been in and out of this house a trillion times, but his grandmother hasn’t, and damnation, I will make this house look beautiful for her.

(wait a second…I think I was doing a list-thing here…hang on…)

(and OK! We’re back!)

2. I’m still going to be in my cast on Thanksgiving, which means I get to cook a meal one-handed. Now Pete will absolutely be there to help me, especially since I can’t wash my hand so have sworn that I will not even so much as look at the naked turkey (also because you have to consider that I have been scratching my cast with a flat-headed screwdriver, so I probably have terrible gashes and open wounds beneath the cast that I can’t even see!). Safety first!

However, since he also loves to cook, it turns into a “oh wait…maybe you should add this,”or “hey shouldn’t you be doing it like this?” and then I smash him in the face with a cast iron skillet and we spend Thanksgiving in the hospital. So, I’m slightly concerned that I’m going to sit through the meal alternately weeping that I Just. Couldn’t. Get. It. Right and giving Pete my soul-withering “I hope you burn in a fiery hell” stare.

Or, it could turn out perfectly and then fairies will clean the house and gold doubloons will fall out of our posteriors.

(OH MY GOD! Tangent! This is why I need to update much more frequently. I think I have forgotten how to write in a coherent manner [and holy crap I just kept writing “manor” and thinking “why doesn’t that look right?!])

Anyway: The goddamn point of all of this is that I have been painting a lot. The living room was completely finished before I hacked myself open (well…if you ignore the fact that none of the pictures are hung, we don’t even have BLINDS, let alone drapes or curtains or anything, there is still an errant sofa in there which we don’t know what to do with, which results in a chair in totally the wrong place, and said sofa and chair don’t even have slip covers…and dear god this was a terrible exercise. Excuse me while I go vomit.)

So, what I’ve just realized is that while my living room may be painted, it is essentially unfinished, and now I need to worry about that, too. Thanks a lot, blog! You awful, jealous bitch! I will NOT be saving a piece of pecan pie for you. You’re getting fat, anyway.

(Focus, Taylor! FOCUS!) So, we’ve been painting the dining room so that we can move the table and chairs in this weekend. Pete’s mom has been helping me so we’re actually almost finished. Now we only have the downstairs bathroom and the hallway left and the first floor will be done (well except for the kitchen, but that is a later project). I will attempt to take pictures, but I have somehow forgotten how to use my browser to embed images, so I can’t promise anything.).

And also, I’m going to try to update more, since I am clearly forgetting how to communicate with the outside world.

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6 responses to this post.

  1. Funny. I think Pete should do the cooking, painting and cleaning until you are all better.

    Reply

  2. Taylor, take a deep breath, have a glass of wine and operate off a to-do list.

    Make sure you have a schedule for cooking and post it on the fridge or some central location. Since your cooking for others you probably want to make sure you don’t omit a “vital” dish that someone could whine about.

    Definitely make Pete handle the turkey (and gravy! way too much stirring).

    Do you have a stand mixer?

    Cranberry sauce is simple enough for one handed fixing. Make Pete be your sous chef for any chopping. In that role he’s not allowed to suggest, talk, or tweak unless you ask for opinions. 😉

    Good luck, you are in my thoughts and missed in the Lowcountry.

    Reply

  3. ack you’re not your

    ::sigh::

    Reply

  4. Posted by Ezra on November 15, 2007 at 11:53 pm

    In honor of the “list”…

    1. Turner Field, Taylor, not Fenway Park. Just because you move to MA doesn’t mean you can abandon us down here where we can still wear shorts without freezing.

    2. Your doctor understands more about your hand than you do, so you should try not to pick up boxes.

    3. Tetanus shot.

    4. Just do what i did the first Thanksgiving Lindsey and I lived together… sit back, relax, watch the parade (I mean Football because I’m a man. Yeah.) and blame any bad food on him.

    5. Everyone say it with me… puh-con = pecan.

    Reply

  5. Posted by Taylor on November 16, 2007 at 9:47 am

    Heather- I started my list last night! Thanks!

    Ezra- I got a tetanus shot, so I won’t be writhing in agony as my muscles seize and constrict any time soon.

    And PUH-CON!

    Reply

  6. This year my wife decided to have a dry run thanksgiving day to test out her recipes. We soaked the bird in a brine solution she got at William Sonoma it really kept it moist. OMG, the turkey was so good and I get to do it again in a few days!

    Reply

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