I hope that you don’t mind that I’m doing this on my blog, but I wanted everyone to be able to read it. I wanted everyone to know how much I love you and how much I appreciate you and how indescribably thankful I am that you are my mother.
I know its a crapshoot when kids are born. Sometimes kids are born into the best possible circumstances, sometimes they are born into the worst. Damn. I really lucked out. I feel like I won the lottery. There is this really famous survey called the Proust Questionnaire, that asks insightful questions that are supposed to get to the core of someone’s beliefs and personality, and one of the questions is, “what would you consider the greatest tragedy.” My answer has always been “if I had been born to different parents.” You and Daddy are the best things that have ever happened to me.
I just want you to know how much I appreciate you as a mother. I literally cannot think of a single thing that I wish you had done differently (except maybe that you hadn’t made me drive that Ford Taurus for so many years), and I can think of millions of things, tiny and enormous, that you have done that I am grateful for.
All of the things that I am proud of about myself, all of the things that make me who I am, I have because of you (except for my ability to do accents, because that comes from Daddy). I am fair-minded and thoughtful because of you. I believe in doing the right thing because of you. I am confident and sure because you encouraged me to be. I am capable because you taught me to be. I feel like I can do anything I want to, and that I can take on the world, because you were always sure that I could. Thank you for telling me to take responsibility for myself and my actions. And thank you for always, always being there if I needed something.
And Mom, thank you for my independence. Thank you for teaching me to take care of myself, and for allowing me to find my own way. Thank you for putting aside all of your motherly instincts that were screaming at you to keep me close and not to let me do anything stupid, so that I could grow on my own. I know that the hardest thing for any mother to do is to let their kids grow up. To let them learn to be self-sufficient. To finally release them into the world to thrive as their own person. But you did it. Without hesitation. And as I have come to learn more about this world, I have learned how rare that is. I see 30 year-olds who still call their mothers every day for the most mundane advice. I see people who simply cannot comprehend a life without their mother there to tell them what to do with themselves. Thank you for making sure I wasn’t one of them.
I hope that I have made you proud. I hope that you see your work, and your love, and your 24+ years of trying to help me survive in who I am today. I hope that you see your influence in everything I do, in every step that I take, in every decision that I make. Because I see it. And I say thank you every day.
I love you mom.